15 items or less. 20 items or less. This shopping register is dear to my heart. I usually shop in increments. When I shop I usually buy 15 items or less. This means I have the privilege of standing in the short lane at the store which allows either 20, 15 or 10 items or less.

You know what really peeves me? When people go to that line knowing full well they have more items. Now, I’m a reasonable person. If I’m standing in a 15 or less line and someone comes in with 16 or even 20 items, hey, not a big deal. I won’t think less of you, I won’t get mad or irritated, heck you won’t even get a dirty look.

Here’s the problem. You are in the 15 items or less line and someone with 30 items gets in front of you. Honestly, when that happens I just want to grab them by the collar and say “Don’t you know how to count! Go back to kindergarten!”

Seriously, the other day I was at Target and I had 3, count them, 1, 2, 3 items. I was running late to get back to work and when I went to the 15 items or less line the woman in front of me had 46 items. How do I know this? Well she took SO dang long I had time between my murderess thoughts, dirty looks and red faced rage to count each and every item. And wouldn’t you know it, while the cashier was ringing her up she grabbed some gum, a candy bar and a bottle of water. Then she said “I know I have more items…” And do you know what the cashier said to her? “*giggle* awe it’s okay.”

IS IT OK? NO it’s not okay. It might be okay for her, but for the rest of us, who actually have 5 items or less, it’s not ok and we want to kill you! But LJ, why didn’t you just go to another line? Because those were very long lines and this line, this 15 items or less line that I’m in was specifically designed for me, someone with less than 15 items so that people that had a handful of things to buy could go in a quick line and not have to wait for the people that have 50 items in their cart!

It really defeats the purpose. After 10 minutes of waiting for her to be done (oh yes, she had the gall to write a check!) as she walked away I simply said “46!” What makes her so important the rules just don’t apply to her?

Here’s a hint: When you go to the grocery store and you have more than 10, 15 or 20 items, have the common decency to go into a regular lane. Other wise the people behind you will probably plot was to A) Poke your eyes out, B) Dismember you or C) Just plain kill you. Because I swear, one day you line stealer’s are going to be in front of the wrong person.

Oh SNNNNNNAP!